University Challenge: bringing out the snob in us all since 1962

Last night BBC Two aired an episode of University Challenge that was a real humdinger. Jesus came from behind (hur hur) and snatched the victory from the jaws of Warwick at the death and it was all very, very exciting.

Of course, when I say ‘exciting’, it wasn’t as exciting as, say, someone leaping from an exploding car with a baby stuffed down each sock… University Challenge is a different kind of thrill – the thrill of being a clever clogs and being a snob.

You see, a snob is either a person who tends to patronize or ignore people regarded as social inferiors or one who affects an offensive air of self-satisfied superiority in matters of taste or intellect. University Challenge brings both of these things out in me.

Basically, this means sneering at students or being completely and utterly against absolutely any team from Oxbridge universities.

Whilst this may seem a little unfair, for me, it’s the whole point of watching the show. Anyone who simply tunes in for a bally good time, to whoop with delight in the face of all those little spongey brains is… well… spineless and dull.

The very reason I tune in to University Challenge is to firstly, see how many questions I get right (I average about 10, which is a clear signal of my idiocy in the face of these intelligent little gits) and secondly, to pick a side to support.

Naturally, because I’m Northern and never went to university, I see the Oxbridge lot as the enemy. Of course, they’re not the enemy at all… however, I love the weekly opportunity to be a complete pig-headed dick-for-brains. I roll around in my own inverted snobbery for a whole 30 minutes, gleeful in the hope that somewhere else in the country, some old Etonian is yelling “STICK IT TO THOSE NORTHERN SHAGSACKS FROM THEIR GLORIFIED POLYTECHNICS!

Mostly, Britain is a placid, lip-biting place. We all get along pretty well, despite what the nightly news tells you. When I meet a Cambridge graduate, I say hello, they say hello back and everything is fine. However, that’s no fun. It’s oh-so-British to hate people for no reason at all. Instead of picking on people and driving them away, it’s so much more fun to be a complete cock in the comfort of your own home with no-one getting hurt.

If you’ve been holding it in, I suggest you tune in to University Challenge and slag off people for no reason. Who knows, you might learn a few things in the process too.

About the author

I'm Mof Gimmers.

I've been writing about TV for a long time. I love it and loathe it in equal measures. I'm pretty sure the TV feels the same away about me too.
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