Chris to store cupboard, "I've never seen nuffin so beautiful as you in my whole life..."
Yesterday in the Big Brother house, it was a joyous day for lo, the shopping arrived!
Yes that’s right, amid a background of harps playing and angelic voices hailing hallelujah, the much longed for, and debated over, groceries arrived in the store room…
And predictably enough, Chris was fully prepared to mow down anyone who stood in his way to get at the goodies, but he was in for a shock when he realized that some of what they’d ordered wasn’t there! I know!
However, it turns out that the housemates are ‘special’ when it comes to their ability to perform simple addition, and they’d overspent by £147.
That of course meant that BB removed items to the value of the overspend, which saw Chris furious because he claimed that Lydia – who was writing the order down and who bollo**ed Chris for his mental arithmetic – rubbed out his adding up, and got it all wrong as a result.
But Lydia hastened to point out to any nay’sayers that she’d ordered a substantial quantity of biscuits, and the fickle housemates were at first grudgingly, then wholeheartedly, impressed with the 20 packs of dunkables and forgave her for the maths error.
However, with the general joy of food still dominating conversation, BB had a surprise in store for the housemates…
Calling each one to the Diary Room, he gave them a simple challenge; stick your paw in a box and you’ll win a biscuit.
But of course, it couldn’t be that simple, and it wasn’t, because the HMs had no idea what was in the box they had to put their hand into. For some, they encountered dirt, for others, randomly severed hands awaited, and for yet others, 
feathers and assorted other unfathomables lay in wait.
However, everyone manned up and did it, earning not only enough biscuits to keep a third world country going for a week, but also yet more booze. Result.
So the evening went well for most, but for Ashleigh and Lauren, their night was dominated by Lushleigh-gate…
To briefly recap… Ashleigh thinks Lauren fancies Luke S. Ashleigh thinks that Luke S fancies Lauren. Lauren thinks nobody likes her, much less fancies her. Ashleigh broke things off with Luke S so that he can be with Lauren. Luke S hasn’t expressed an opinion.
Phew. I had to cut that long story short because it’s absolute bollocks.
It’s just booze-fuelled teenager stuff, and I have to say, I have next to no interest in it whatsoever. But if you do, you can click here and here and here to see clips of what happened.
Far more interesting was Chris’s prank in the wee small hours of Day 11…
He thought it would be a really good idea to sneak up on Caroline, and the lady was not amused. Click here to see a clip of her reaction.
We will of course have a round up of Day 11’s morning news this afternoon, so don’t nobody go nowhere!
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