families at war (5/5)
20.00–21.00

Five’s Trisha Goddard continues to help families besieged by arguments and deep-rooted tensions. Aiding Trisha in her efforts are Jamil Qureshi and Andy Duncan – experts in the field of ‘mind-shaping’. In tonight’s programme, the last of the series, the team comes to the aid of Suzanne and Tracy, a mother and daughter from Derbyshire who have had a difficult relationship forover two decades.

The hostility between Suzanne and Tracy started some 22 years ago when Tracy rebelled against her strict, religious upbringing. At 17, she had a baby outside of marriage, before going on to have a further four children and a string of unsuccessful relationships with men. After moving to South Africa, Tracy’s problems persisted and her two eldest children were taken into care and adopted. Tracy and her family have since been reunited in England where they now live, but her kids do not know their grandmother, despite living nearby. “My relationship with my mother is basically nonexistent,” says Tracy.

Suzanne, meanwhile, realises that things must change: “I definitely feel that this is the last chance with Tracy.” The two women arrive at the Norfolk treatment house separately, but soon erupt into an argument. Tracy accuses her mother of failing to support her when her children were taken away, while Suzanne questions why she was not invited to her daughter’s wedding last year. After just a few minutes, Suzanne can take the strain no longer and storms off into the garden. “I don’t want her in my life!” she proclaims. “I’m sick of the lies!”

Trisha eventually persuades Suzanne to return tothe house to talk to Tracy and two of her sons, 21year-old Reese and 17-year-old Michael, both of whom have arrived to lend their mother support. A brief chat around the table shows that all parties agree that this is the last chance for the family to sort out their problems, but stubbornness, especially on the part of Suzanne, seems to be halting any progress. As the first day draws to a close, experts Andy and Jamil assess the situation and conclude that Suzanne is key to the solution ofthe family’s discord. They decide to work on Suzanne’s pain and anger, using regression and relaxation techniques, alongside other therapies.

Tuesday morning brings an early start, as Jamil gets stuck in to the task at hand. Speaking first to Tracy, he learns that she is keen to develop a relationship with her mother, and for her children to know their grandmother. She realises she has made mistakes in the past, but wants to move on. When he speaks to Suzanne, Jamil discovers that she has a very similar attitude. “Would you like this situation to change?” asks Jamil. “Yes, I miss her,” responds Suzanne. But are the two genuinely prepared to put the painful past behind them? To find out, Jamil takes them to the beach where he asks them each to write something in the sand to represent what they hope to achieve during their treatment. Again, both mother and daughter agree that they want the past to be forgotten.

Back at the house, Andy begins a consultation with Suzanne, but finds it difficult to get past her defences. He learns of her attitude towards her father, to whom she never felt close, but it is not until Andy broaches the topic of Suzanne’s mother than he makes real progress. After some regression therapy to help her deal with the grief of losing her mother 15 years ago, Suzanne breaks down in tears.

Jamil is also making headway with Tracy. Using a relaxation technique, he tells Tracy that she has control over her own emotions and can look to the future with confidence: “Blame looks backwards; responsibility looks forwards,” he explains. It seems to work, and Tracy ends the session feeling that she can achieve anything.

As the final day arrives, things look very positive for the family, with mother and daughter having stayed up until midnight chatting. But the really encouraging sign comes in the afternoon when Suzanne and Tracy share a hug. “I’m going to start my new life now,” says Tracy.