Angelo’s

angelo’s(6/6)

Five’s home-grown sitcom concludes tonight. Set in a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square, Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers. In this episode, Angelo plans a mural for the cafe; Maria’s modelling career gets off to a rocky start at the student fashion show; Shelley and Alicia form an unlikely bond; and Karen has some news for Dave.

Angelo has decided to turn down Café Mania’s proposal to buy his café and instead makes plans to improve his humble establishment. “I’ve got a lot of ambition for this place,” he tells Russell. “I’ve always wanted a mural but I’ve never had the guts to do it.” Angelo sketches out a design for his painting that includes the Queen Mum, Diana and David Jason looking down on some of the café’s regular customers – although Russell would prefer not to be immortalised on the wall, for fear his wife might see it. “If Christine ever happened to come in, she might think I was leading a double life or something,” he says anxiously.

Lovelorn Kris, meanwhile, continues his campaign to woo Maria. “You look nice,” he says. “Thanks. I can’t say the same back,” she replies. Kris is surprised to hear that Maria has put her singing on hold to concentrate on her modelling career. She is about to appear at a fashion show for her art student friends, and agrees to let Kris come along if he pays the taxi fare. But Maria’s dreams of catwalk acclaim sour when she sees that the other models are a mixture of drunks, tramps and drug addicts. She is even less impressed by the outfit she has to wear – a burkastyle robe with a clown face and pointy cones on her bra. “I look mental!” she exclaims.

Maria storms out of the show, furious with the students for using her and with Kris for laughing at her. “They made a total fool of me!” she says. Maria turns to her dad for comfort, and tells him she has changed her mind about staying in the café. “Can’t we just sell the café? I hate it here!” she cries. Angelo gives in to his daughter’s request – against his better judgment – and agrees to sell up to Café Mania. When word spreads that Maria is moving away, both Kris and Mickey feel compelled to declare their feelings for her. But who will get the girl?

Elsewhere, Alicia is still being ignored by Maria, so she strikes up a conversation with Shelley. Before long, the unhinged taxi driver is telling her about how she ran over a cat the night before. “I think it was my fault because I was a bit drunk,” Shelly confesses, before revealing that the RSPCA ambulance crew told her the cat was in fact a rat. “Which was weird, because I was sure I was stroking a cat,” she says.

Shelley’s story does not put Alicia off agreeing to go to a club with her, but their fledging friendship falls apart en route when Shelley explains the precise nature of the club. They are going to the “Wood Green Promise Keepers Club”, where the only rule is “you have to have your cherry in place”. A doubtful Alicia thinks she might not be eligible to join the club’s only two members. “I haven’t kept a promise since I was, like, 12,” she says.

Also this week, Dave gets to the bottom of Karen’s tetchy behaviour when he sees a pregnancy test confirming that his wife is – at long last – expecting. But a somewhat subdued Karen takes some time to warm to the idea. “It’s brilliant news,” she mutters, before adding, “it’s definitely yours.” What secret could she be hiding?

angelo’s(5/6)

Five’s home-grown sitcom continues tonight. Set in a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square, Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers. In this episode, Angelo weighs up an offer to buy his café; Maria alienates her friends by falling in with a group of art students; Kris avoids an old acquaintance; and Karen and Dave attend Kevin’s party.

Angelo and his fellow café owners are attending a presentation by Café Mania, a franchise company with designs on London’s greasy spoons. But the fancy charts and business jargon prove too complicated for the humble proprietors, who have no idea what the speaker is talking about. Back at the café, Angelo tells Russell he is unsure about whether or not to sell his establishment. “I don’t even know if I’m ready to give all this up,” he says. “I mean, cooking is my life.”

For her part, Maria cannot wait to see her father cash in and accept Café Mania’s money. In the meantime, she has made friends with a bunch of trendy art students who seem to love her every inane utterance. Mickey is blunt in his assessment of her new pals: “They look like a pack of tw*ts,” he tells her. Maria is incensed by Mickey’s opinion and throws him out of the café. “He is so dumped, I swear!” she declares. Alicia is quick to follow him when she tries to make Maria see the students are patronising her. “They’re making a fool of you,” she says, before she too is sent packing.

Maria is happy to continue hanging around with her new friends, but fails to foresee their reaction when she mentions that her father is about to sell Angelo’s to Café Mania. “Are you serious?” one student asks her. “Café Mania are scum. You’ve got to talk your dad out of it.” The students attempt to give Maria a lesson in the evils of globalisation, whilst praising the quaint, earthy qualities of Angelo’s. “But it’s a dump,” Maria replies. However, she soon comes round to the idea of saving the café from corporate takeover – just as her father reaches a similar decision.

Elsewhere, Kris is crestfallen when he runs into Paul, an old buddy from acting school, on the bus. Desperate to hide the fact he is working as a human statue in Trafalgar Square, Kris pretends he is on his way to an audition – in costume. But the pretence becomes harder to maintain when Paul runs into him again outside Angelo’s.

Meanwhile, Dave and Karen attend a party thrown by Dave’s brother, Kevin (Paul Kaye), where Karen gets a sharp reminder that her biological clock is ticking. She retires to a bedroom upstairs, sobbing, and finds Kevin more than willing to provide a shoulder to cry on. “Dave doesn’t understand you,” he purrs in her ear. “But I do. I keep telling you, it’s never too late.” Will Karen succumb to temptation and allow Dave’s randy brother to lend a hand in their fertility struggle?

Also this week, Shelly arranges to meet a man who left his wallet in her cab. And hapless Russell gets involved in an employment opportunity otherwise known as “the envelope scam”.

angelo’s(4/6)

Five’s home-grown sitcom continues tonight. Set in a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square, Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers including Italian owner Angelo and his truculent daughter Maria. In this episode, Angelo seeks female companionship in the form of Russell’s sister; Kris works up the courage to ask Maria on a date; and Dave lands himself in hot water.

Kind-hearted café owner Angelo is chatting to his customer, Russell, when he confesses that he misses the company of a good woman. “Sometimes I think I’d like to meet a nice lady,” he says, wistfully. “You know, it’s been 15 years since my wife went.” Russell mentions that he has a widowed sister about Angelo’s age, and duly agrees to bring her by the café one day for him to meet her. “If she’s not what I like, I’ll just give you a little signal,” Angelo says, cheerfully miming a ‘thumbs down’ from behind the counter.

Angelo is immediately impressed by Russell’s sister Angela, and especially approves of her name. But his conversation gets off to a shaky start with his opening gambit: “So, Russell tells me your husband broke your nose and killed himself?” he says. Fortunately, Angelo gets back on course and manages to charm Angela enough to invite her over for dinner. Their romantic evening goes well, until the arrival of Maria, who is suspicious of Angela’s designs on her father. “If anyone ever hurt him, I’d kill her,” Maria says, staring daggers at Angela. Has Maria’s intervention killed off Angelo’s amorous desires?

Kris, meanwhile, has high hopes for his own love life, when he plucks up the courage to ask Maria out on a date. He proposes they take a day trip on a ‘duck boat’ tourist cruise down the Thames, but is chagrined to hear that Maria has patched up her differences with boyfriend Mickey. However, Maria has second thoughts when she finds that Mickey’s idea of spending time together is to stand in a doorway in the street all day. “You never take me anywhere,” she complains. “I’m fed up with it, man!” Maria impulsively accepts Kris’s offer, only to regret her decision and implore Alicia to come with them.

The trip on the boat starts badly for Kris when he learns that Maria’s friend is accompanying them. But things deteriorate when Alicia gets seasick and Maria discovers that Kris has come ‘prepared’ with a condom – forcing the mortified mime artist to make clear his intentions. “It’s not for you,” he says quickly. “This is deeply embarrassing.”

Elsewhere, grumpy policeman Dave is having an equally miserable time. After making a highly inappropriate joke about Al-Qaeda in Angelo’s café, he is forced to endure a drink in the pub with his fireman friend Steve (played by comedian and poet Tim Key). Dave is fed up of Steve mocking his job and tells Karen that firemen spend most of their time raising money for charity, rather than putting out fires. “How do I know you don’t spend all day rescuing cats stuck up trees?” he asks. Unfortunately, Dave’s jibes backfire badly and he is forced to make a humbling apology. Can nothing go right for the hapless copper?

angelo’s(3/6)

Five’s new home-grown sitcom continues tonight. Set in a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square, Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers including Italian owner Angelo and his truculent daughter Maria. In this episode, Angelo sets up a suggestion box for his customers; Maria is shocked to hear of Mickey’s infidelity; Shelley tracks down her old boyfriend and Karen thinks she might be pregnant.

Feeling charitable, Angelo decides to leave a suggestion box for his customers, inviting their comments on how to improve his café. However, his benign mood is replaced by one of muted wrath when the suggestions prove to be less than positive. Just who had the cheek to write, “You should shave that beerd off, it’s unhighgenic” on one slip of paper? A vexed Angelo tries to identify his illiterate critic by tricking regular customer Russell into providing him with a handwriting sample – to no avail. Fortunately, there is at least one helpful proposal in the box, and before long Angelo has introduced a new three-egg breakfast by “popular demand”.

Elsewhere, Alicia has decided to come clean and admit that she and Mickey shared an intimate moment round the back of the local Tesco Metro. Or, at least, admit that Mickey shared an intimate moment with somebody. “Mickey’s cheating on you,” she tells Maria, before encouraging her to forget about him. Maria will not be placated, however, and starts swearing violent revenge on Mickey and his mystery girl. “Don’t be a mental ‘Trisha’ person, okay?” Alicia says in alarm. “That’s negative energy. You’ve got to get a hobby or something.”

Undeterred, a furious Maria confronts Mickey in the café, forcing Kris to intervene. The gold-suited mime artist almost comes to blows with Mickey when he stands up for Maria and asks him to leave. Maria seems to respond well to Kris’s chivalry, prompting him to go overboard in his attempts to impress her. “Do you want me to rough him up?” he asks. Maria takes him up on the offer, and before long, mild-mannered Kris is wrestling with Mickey in the middle of Trafalgar Square, only for them to be separated by Karen and Dave. Kris returns battered and bruised to the café, keen to let Maria know of Mickey’s fate. “I’m pleased to say he’s being detained at Her Majesty’s pleasure,” he announces. “He’s at Buckingham Palace?” Maria replies.

The problems in Maria’s love life serve to remind Shelley of her own. She proudly presents Maria and Alicia with a photo of her “fella”. “I’ve not been able to see him for a while because the courts wouldn’t let me,” she explains, before tearing the man’s wife out of the picture. “I just drive round his area everyday, hoping I’ll catch him,” she adds. “It’s so romantic.” Later that day, Shelley accosts her beau, Mike, in the street – much to his obvious dismay. But as Mike struggles to get away, Shelley implores him to give her a second – or even a first – chance. Will she snag her man?

Also this week, Karen tells Dave she thinks she might be pregnant at long last. She gets so carried away with the idea that she ignores Dave’s suggestion that she buy a pregnancy test to make sure. “A woman just knows,” Karen tells him. Is the patter of tiny feet on the way?

angelo’s(2/6)

Five’s new home-grown sitcom continues tonight. Set in a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square, Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers including Italian owner Angelo and his truculent daughter Maria. In this episode, Maria meets Kris at the auditions for ‘The X-Factor’; Dave and Karen turn to Dave’s brother Kevin for help in conceiving a baby and Shelley terrifies another customer.

Maria’s dreams of superstardom receive a boost this week when she hears that she has made the long list for auditions on ‘The X-Factor’. “I’m down to the last 12,000!” she tells her father. Maria and best pal Alisha head to the auditions, where the would-be diva has plenty of time to practise her routine in the queue.

Whilst the girls are waiting, dejected street performer Kris emerges from the building, having been rejected by judges on the grounds he was “horrific”. Maria does her best to cheer Kris up. “You can’t let a little thing like being horrific stand in your way,” she says, consoling him with the thought that he has at least appeared on TV. “They show all the sh*t ones, don’t they?” she adds. But when Kris informs her that the initial round of auditions is not televised, Maria flounces off in a huff.

Meanwhile, married police officers Karen and Dave are forced to confront their fertility crisis when they meet up with Dave’s highly fecund brother, Kevin (Paul Kaye, ‘Two Thousand Acres of Sky’, ‘Kingdom’). Karen is desperate to conceive and can only be impressed by her brother-in-law’s prodigious output of five children in five years. Likewise, Kevin appears to be keen to help Karen out of her predicament. “I’m just saying, you should try to keep it in the family,” he says lasciviously. “If there’s anything I can do to help, you just have to ask…”

Karen duly invites Kevin and Dave to meet her in Angelo’s, where she broaches the delicate matter of having Kevin donate his sperm. Kevin, however, is keen to offer his services in a more direct way – for the one-off fee of £1,000. “He’s just asked for money to shag you!” an outraged Dave tells his wife. Kevin insists the payment would compensate him for the sacrifice of staying away from his child and never hearing it call him ‘daddy’. “That’s what you do with all your kids!” Dave retorts. Will Karen be able to talk her husband round to the idea of fathering his idiot brother’s child?

Elsewhere, minicab driver Shelley intimidates another hapless customer when she refuses to let him out of the car. “I run a little club on Thursdays,” she tells him. “It’s a weekly get-together where virgins can come and relax and be themselves. You should drop along one night.” Unfortunately, Shelley’s hard-sell campaign does not win over her mortified fare.

Also this week, Angelo decides to spruce up his café’s interior by adding a signed photo of chrome-domed Hollywood action God Bruce Willis. But who should make way for “the Willis” on the wall – Darren Day or Julie Goodyear? And Alisha has designs on Maria’s boyfriend Mickey, only to be roundly rebuffed.

angelo’s(1/6)

Following in the steps of ‘Suburban Shootout’ and ‘Respectable’ is another home-grown sitcom for Five. Written by Sharon Horgan (‘Pulling’, ‘Free Agents’), Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers who frequent a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square.

Widowed Italian owner Angelo (Steve Brody, ‘The Office’) is – sort of – assisted by his truculent daughter Maria (Shelley Longworth, ‘Tittybangbang’, ‘It’s Adam and Shelley’), an aspiring singer who thinks her talents are wasted in the café. Angelo’s regulars include married police officers Karen (writer Horgan) and Dave (Paul Garner), intimidating minicab driver Shelley (Miranda Hart, ‘Nighty Night’), Maria’s best friend Alicia (Alice Lowe, ‘Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace’, ‘Hot Fuzz’) and bitter mime artist Kris (Simon Farnaby, ‘The Mighty Boosh’, ‘Blunder’) – who has a major crush on Maria.

In the first episode, Maria thinks she has a chance at stardom when the singer of her boyfriend’s band is shot; Karen and Dave visit the fertility clinic and Angelo receives a tempting offer from a representative of an American café chain.

It is just another day at Angelo’s. While Angelo indulges in one of his regular rants to a radio talkshow host, Kris professes his love for Maria through the medium of mime, Shelley yells “Minicab… minicab… minicab for Pete… MINICAB!!!” and Karen and Dave pop in for two glasses of milk and a chat about their fertility problems.

Exciting as all this may be, Maria is convinced that she is destined for bigger things. She spots her chance at the big time when boyfriend Mickey tells her that Minx, the singer in his band, has been shot. Maria thinks that she would be an ideal replacement. “It’s gonna be great, man,” she insists. “We’re gonna be like Jay–Z and Beyonce!” A derisive laugh from Alicia indicates that she does not agree. “Nothing like Bee-yonce,” she snorts. However, when she accompanies Maria to an audition, Alicia finds herself caught up in all the excitement and decides to try out as a dancer. But was “you shouldn’t disrespect yourself like that” really the response she was after?

Elsewhere, Dave and Karen drop in at a fertility clinic but have to leave when their radios crackle – “couldn’t get the time off,” explains Karen apologetically. Patrolling Trafalgar Square, Karen spots a lost child and tells Dave that she will take the boy back to the station… missing out the part where she takes the kid on a day out at the London Dungeon on the way!

Also in this opening episode, Angelo is intrigued by a classy customer and takes the chance to introduce her to his wall of fame – a line of celebrity punters including Noel Edmonds and Anita Dobson. But it soon emerges that the mystery woman has come for more than a ‘frothy coffee’ – she has a proposal for Angelo. How would he feel about turning his café into the latest branch of an American coffee chain? Maria thinks he should take the offer, reasoning that he will most likely be offered “a million” for the place – but can Angelo let his beloved café fall into corporate hands?

angelo’s

Following in the steps of ‘Suburban Shootout’ and ‘Respectable’ is another home-grown sitcom for Five. Written by Sharon Horgan (‘Pulling’), Angelo’s follows the fortunes of a group of misfits, wannabes and losers who frequent a greasy spoon in London’s Trafalgar Square.

Widowed Italian owner Angelo is – sort of – assisted by his daughter Maria (‘Tittybangbang’, ‘It’s Adam and Shelley’), who thinks her talents are wasted on waitressing and would rather play Beyonce to her aspiring rapper boyfriend Mickey’s Jay-Z. Angelo’s regulars include married police officers Karen (writer Horgan) and Dave (Paul Garner), intimidating minicab driver Shelley (Miranda Hart, ‘Nighty Night’), Maria’s best friend Alicia (Alice Lowe, ‘Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace’, ‘Hot Fuzz’) and bitter mime artist Kris (Simon Farnaby, ‘The Mighty Boosh’, ‘Blunder’) – who has a major crush on Maria.

In the first episode, Maria thinks she has a chance at stardom when the singer of Mickey’s band is shot; Karen and Dave visit the fertility clinic and Angelo receives a tempting offer from a representative of an American café chain.

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